How I Chose to Handle the 'New Year, New You' Vibes for 2018
Don't you love resolutions? The unattainability, the impracticality, the notion that January 1st means everything will change?
January first is just another day, and resolutions are too loaded with expectation and pressure to be reasonable.
Don't get me wrong, I love a good new year fresh start vibe as much as the next person, and I would be lying if I said that I don't put some new things in motion, but this year I decided to do things a little differently in hopes of actually making a significant and long lasting change to my life.
Like everyone else, I have fallen victim to the New Years Resolution failure 1 month in. I decided, especially for me, that the way in which we structure and present resolutions to ourselves makes them wholly unattainable. "I want to lose weight this year" is a common one for most people, and it is one I have thrown at myself many times, only to get overwhelmed and give up. The attitude, the intention and the goal itself all set it up to be unsuccessful from the start.
I mean, lets be honest, being better with my health is definitely a goal for the year, but on Jan 1st was eating pizza, chicken nuggets and candy whilst nursing my hangover and my soul. And I let myself do it happily and guilt free because of the way I decided to tackle the 'New Year, New Me' desire we all have.
I didn't just decide 'This is something I don't like about myself' this year.
I chose to ask the question 'What parts of my life an I not happy with, and where do I want to be in 12 months'.
And this is a huge mentality shift from where I have been past years on December 31st for a number of reasons (a mental breakdown and starting therapy being one, but that is a story for another day).
I gave myself a vision to work to, a version of myself that I wanted to be in 12 months, a person I would be happy being and a list of things behind me that make me proud of myself for accomplishing.
I didn't want to look back and say 'I wish I had done that in 2018', I wanted to say 'I did that in 2018'.
And I started making a list.
- I want to be smarter with my money, and alongside that start saving for a Melbourne Girls Weekend for my 24th birthday and a May 2019 trip to Europe for my 25th.
- I want to work on my physical health so that I am not hindered on shoots by my RSI or my bad back. I don't want my back to be an excuse for not being able to do things.
- I want to start more regularly working out and eating better to benefit my mental health so my anxiety and depression are no longer problems and cannot hinder me anymore.
- I want to learn how to be braver and not let my fear of change or the unknown stop me from chasing after my goals and my dreams.
- I want to start further building up Graphite (my photography business) so that it could become my solitary income as well as have its own healthy account.
- I want to start properly blogging. Like properly instead of starting and stopping a few weeks later for some reason or other. I've wanted to for years, I love it, and I want to build that into part of my career.
- I want to try and be kinder to myself, have faith in myself, and have more confidence in myself.
I want to be happy, and not let all these hopes and dreams just live inside my head all year.
My resolutions this year are me actioning the kind of person I want to be in life by the end of 2018 and beyond, as much as I know at my young age of 23, rather than picking on one thing I hate about myself and changing it. I focused on self care and life goals.
And beyond just writing the list, I wrote down plans (and am still writing them down, 2 weeks into January), to outline what I want to do and how I want to do it. I didn't put the pressure on Jan 1st, in fact I very specifically told myself that one of my self care priorities was to give myself 2 full weeks of no work to rest my mind and body after a very long time of not doing so.
And whats more important is I'm baby stepping everything and trying to be as kind to myself as possible. I so intently wanted to make some changes to become happier in myself and in my life, and putting brutal pressure on myself to change was not the way to do it.
You can make the decision to change your life in a split second, but you cannot expect to actually change that quickly. It's something I've learnt the hard way. That is what resolutions feel like to me. They hold an expectation that you will be able to change your way of life drastically in some way on January first. And I have done everything in my power to get the feeling of a new year fresh start without throwing any unrealistic expectations on myself that will ultimately fail, or I'm trying my very hardest to do so anyway.
Be nicer to yourself, be realistic, and don't lay on the pressure too thick. You are not a failure if you ate a slice of pizza (or a whole pizza and some Maltesers) on January 1st.
QUESTION: What goals do you have for the year? Be they career or personal I'd love to hear what you want to achieve in 2018.